A 24 year old woman who had earned a bachelor’s degree in psychology and neuroscience at CUNY’s Macaulay Honors College tragically jumped to her death at approximately 11.44am on December 22nd.
Yocheved Gourarie didn’t leave a traditional suicide note, instead she planned a post on instagram for after her death to those she left behind.
‘If you’re reading this, I’m gone,’ Yocheved stated in the post which she had scheduled to run one day after she rode the subway into Manhattan and purchased a ticket to the Vessel, a popular tourist attraction. When she reached the level of the structure, she climbed onto the railing and purposefully jumped.
‘I hope you can find some comfort in knowing I am no longer in pain,’ she wrote in her post. Youcheved had suffered from the age of 12 from the eating disorder anorexia and had chronicled her mental health struggles on previous posts.
Her post went on to thank those that had supported her through her struggles: ‘I don’t care to go into the reasons why I’m gone, but there are certainly more than thirteen. I scheduled a note to send to my parents posthumously..Even just publishing this may pain them… I don’t want to do that, I just want to leave my mark on the world…. All of you have made my life so much more full, brighter and happier than it would have been without you. Your support, your encouragement, your hugs, your invitations, your smiles, your texts, your tagging me in memes you think I’d find funny… None of you could have done anything – or done more- to prevent this from happening. You all did your absolute best and for that I am eternally grateful.’
Emergency Services responding to a 911 call, pronounced Yocheved dead at the scene. She had reportedly taken with her “information making it easy to ascertain who to contact” after her death.
Her father who the week before her death had appeared with her in a post playing the electric piano while she sung “Moon River” has written that ‘Life will never be the same.’
It seems from her earlier admissions on instagram that Yocheved was still struggling with her demons. In August, 2019 she wrote, ‘ I often give off the impression that I am recovered and am offering advice from a place of complete healing.. I‘m not. Anorexia continues to plague me, though its grip is far looser than it used to be and I have much more insight into my disordered thoughts and patterns.’
Yocheved spent two months at Centre for Change a facility to assist women with eating disorders her father shared on instagram. He said that everyday while she was there he sent her a pic of a cute pup. ‘Yocheved, you were the cutest, prettiest, kindest ‘pup’ a father could hope for.’ he poignantly wrote. ‘It will take time to heal. Thanks to all for helping us along in that process.’